Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

What Do The 10 Poorest Cities In The United States Have In Common?

The Ten Poorest U.S. Cities

City, State, % of People Below the Poverty Level
1. Detroit, MI 32.5%
2. Buffalo, NY 29.9%
3. Cincinnati, OH 27.8%
4. Cleveland, OH 27.0%
5. Miami, FL 26.9%
6. St. Louis, MO 26.8%
7. El Paso, TX 26.4%
8. Milwaukee, WI 26.2%
9. Philadelphia, PA 25.1%
10. Newark, NJ 24.2%

What do the top ten cities (over 250,000) with the highest poverty rate all have in common?

Detroit, MI (1st on the list) hasn’t elected a Republican mayor since 1961.
Buffalo, NY (2nd) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1954.
Cincinnati, OH (3rd) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1984.
Cleveland, OH (4th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1989.
Miami, FL (5th) has never had a Republican mayor.
St. Louis, MO (6th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1949.
El Paso, TX (7th) has never had a Republican mayor.
Milwaukee, WI (8th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1908.
Philadelphia, PA (9th) hasn’t elected a Republican mayor since 1952.
Newark, NJ (10th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1907.

Einstein once said, 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.'

(The preceding was emailed to me by my friend Jim Vanne earlier today.)

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth And Vladimir Putin

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth and Vladimir Putin all die and go to Hell.
While there, they notice a red telephone and ask what it was for.

The devil tells them, 'it's for calling back to Earth.'

Putin calls Russia and talks for 5 minutes; when he is finished the devil
informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check.

Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes;
 her phone bill is 6 million dollars, so she writes the devil a check.

Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours;
when he is finished the devil informs him that the cost is $5.00.

When Putin hears this, he goes ballistic and asks
the devil why Bush got to call the USA so cheaply.

The devil smiles and replies,
"Since Obama took over, the country has gone to Hell 
 ... so it's a local call."

Friday, May 25, 2012

9 Famous Quotes From Democrats



#1 "It depends what your definition of 'is' is.'' - Bill Clinton

#2 "Those rumors are false ... I believe in the sanctity of marriage." - John Edwards

#3 "I invented the Internet." - Al Gore

#4 "The next person that tells me I'm not religious, I'm going to shove my rosary beads up their butt." - Joe Biden

#5 "America is no longer, uh, what it, uh, could be, uh, what it was once was - uh, and I say to myself, uh, I don't want that future, uh, for my children." - Barack Obama

#6 "I have campaigned in all 57 states." - Barack Obama (Quoted 2008)

#7 "You don't need God anymore, you have us Democrats." - Nancy Pelosi (Quoted 2006)

#8 "Bill is the greatest husband and father I know; no one is more faithful, true, and honest than he." - Hillary Clinton (Quoted 1998)

#9 "We just have to pass the Healthcare Bill to see what's in it." - Nancy Pelosi (Quoted March, 2010)

Thursday, May 10, 2012

My Work Here Is Done

"Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery"    --Winston Churchill 
The following was emailed to me the other day....

These are possibly the 5 best sentences you'll ever read:

1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity, by legislating the
wealth out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to
work because the other half is going to take care of them;
and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work,
because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.
Can you think of any reason for not
sharing this?
Neither could I....
God bless and protect us AND, our Constitution....

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Dogs Against Obama

It has recently come to light that Barack Obama has admitted eating dog meat when he was a child in Indonesia. The following YouTube video which was produced by "Dogs Against Obama" features some very funny pictures that find humor in this....

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Iran 1970 vs. Iran Today

Iran 1970 vs. Iran Today....


Any Questions?

The truth is that Iran is a horribly repressive state sponsor of terrorism that is determined to see the state of Israel wiped off the map.  The leaders of Iran are not rational and Iran cannot be allowed to develop nuclear weapons.  

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

A Very Funny Translation Guide For Democrats And Republicans

Why does it seem like Democrats and Republicans miscommunicate so much? Perhaps this translation guide will help.

The following translation guide is very funny and it was emailed to me earlier today....

DEMOCRAT - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - REPUBLICAN

Arsenal of Weapons - - - - - - - - - -Gun Collection
Delicate Wetlands - - - - - - - - - - - - Swamps
Undocumented Worker - - - - - - - - Illegal Alien
Cruelty-Free Materials - - - - - - - - - Synthetic Fiber
Assault and Battery - - - - - - - - - - - Attitude Adjustment
Heavily Armed - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Well Protected
Narrow-minded - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -Righteous
Taxes or Your Fair Share - - - - - - - - Coerced Theft
Commonsense Gun Control - - - - - - - Gun Confiscation Plot
Illegal Hazardous Explosives - - - - - - - - -Fireworks or Stump Removal
Non-viable Tissue Mass - - - - - - - - - - - Unborn Baby
Equal Access to Opportunity - - - - - - - - - Socialism
Multicultural Community - - - - - - - - - - - - -High Crime Area
Fairness or Social Progress - - - - - - - - - - Marxism
Upper Class or "The Rich " - - - - - - - - - - - Self-Employed
Progressive, Change - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -Big Government Scheme
Homeless or Disadvantaged - - - - - - - - - - - Bums or Welfare Leeches
Sniper Rifle - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Scoped Deer Rifle
Investment For the Future - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Higher Taxes
Healthcare Reform - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Socialized Medicine
Extremist, Judgmental, or Hater - - - - - - - - - - - - Conservative
Truants - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Homeschoolers
Victim or Oppressed - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Criminal or Lazy Good-For-Nothing
High Capacity Magazine - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Standard Capacity Magazine
Religious Zealot - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Church-going
Reintroduced Wolves - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Sheep and Elk Killers
Fair Trade Coffee - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Overpriced Yuppie Coffee
Exploiters or "The Rich " - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Employed or Land Owner
The Gun Lobby - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -NRA Members
Assault Weapon - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Semi-Auto (Grandpa's M1 Carbine)
Fiscal Stimulus - - - - - - - - - - - - - - New Taxes and Higher Taxes
Same Sex Marriage - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Legalized Perversion
Mandated Eco-Friendly Lighting - - - - - - - Chinese Mercury-Laden Light Bulbs

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Obamopoly